Rev. George Miller
Oct 6, 2024
Exodus 32:1-14
Many years ago, when much younger, I was
seeing a psychologist who referred a book about being addicted to chaos.
The premise was simple- doctors were
noticing patients who were in constant crisis mode. The doctors began to wonder if there are
those who unintentionally bring chaos onto themselves.
Things like people in the hospital who
seem to be doing well, but on the day of discharge, came down with a new
ailment.
There is a good reason why the psychologist
gave me that book- I was always dealing with chaos.
For example, constant car issues, and
every time something car related occurred, I reacted as if it was hurting my
soul.
Every 2 months, something happened- a flat
tire, fender bender, broken tape deck.
Reading this book made me question my
experiences.
So, when my engine went, instead of
immediately going into chaotic, victim mode, a brand-new thought came to mind-
“Cars are technical objects. Technical objects have technical issues. So take care of it now and start saving for
when something technical happens.”
This thought process still cost $250, however,
somehow, some way, it would be many months before another car issue emerged,
and I responded differently.
Was the book right? Was the psychologist onto something?
Had I been so addicted to chaos that my
energy, my actions were creating swirls of angst that unnecessarily surrounded
me?
Since then, I have developed a theory- if
a pastor does not need chaos to be happy, then chaos is greatly reduced.
Now- ya’ll make think “chaos to be happy?-
that’s insane!”, but-don’t we all have that one friend, that one family member
that if they don’t have chaos to talk about, there’s nothing for them to say?
One of the biggest heartbreaks in my life
is watching how, as my Mother aged, she was actually happy being unhappy, and
because of this she, she died at the very young age of 73.
Being addicted to chaos can sound so
foolish, but perhaps that is part of what is going on in today’s reading.
Here we have a story about Moses, God,
Aaron, and the Israelites, and they have all been through some thangs.
After over 400 years of slavery, the Israelites
are set free.
But before that takes place there is a
series of plagues and disasters. They dedicate
their first born to God; make bread without yeast.
Then they flee the Pharaoh, come against
the Red Sea, and amidst dark skies, the sea parts…
…and the people are expected to walk
between those walls of swirling, uncertain waters…
We have seen the images from Asheville of
what water can do.
Who would want to be the first person to
step through that Red Sea wall, trusting that it would not close in on you?
Then, the Israelites wander the wilderness
for 3 months, before setting up camp by Mt. Sinai.
And you know what God decides to do?
God decides that after allll that,
God and Moses are going to have a 40-day pow-wow where it is just the 2 of
them, on top of the mountain, with God giving Moses instruction to write down.
And the Israelites? They are left alone for those 40 days with no
word from God, and no Moses to lead them, guide them.
It's just them, their earrings, Moses’
sister Miriam and his brother Aaron. So
the Israelites get antsy; anxious.
And what do anxious, antsy people do? They come up with a plan to take away some of
those antsy, anxious feelings.
However, their plan brings a new chaos
into their lives and their journey to the Promised Land.
Perhaps God should’ve been more worried
about their gold then the yeast in their bread.
But you know what? As I grow older, I feel different about
today’s reading.
Used to be a time I looked down upon the Israelites;
chastised them for their impatience; accused them of being unfaithful.
But now that I’m no longer 20, or 30, or
even 40, I have lived some things, experienced some things, done some things, so
my views about the Israelites has changed.
Now there is space for grace.
As former slaves who endured great trauma,
they had become too accustomed to bad things happening to good people.
After all that time fleeing the Pharaoh,
walking between water, wandering in the dessert, perhaps the last thing they
needed to experience was abandonment.
Perhaps the last thing they needed was zero
access to God, zero access to Moses for 40 days.
To go through 6 weeks of uncertainty, not
knowing what was happening, or going to happen next is a lot.
If one dark night of the soul can seem to
last forever, image what 40 days in the dessert can be like.
Without a word from God, or a mention from
Moses, the people take matters into their own hands, and create the idea of
crafting a calf.
There is a a sense of immediacy; a sense
of being abandoned, that the people just want something, anything that can
remind them they are not alone, they are not forsaken, they are not deserted.
At least, unlike God, they can see this golden
calf. At least, unlike Moses, the calf can’t
go up a hill.
So the people, just needing some
assurance, wanting to somehow, some way praise and have hope and to sing and dance,
eat and drink, have Aaron make an idol.
And once again, we can only imagine how,
like in the Garden, this must’ve broken God’s heart.
Instead of walking in cool breezes or
under starry skies, the people have turned to an image made of their own
earrings….
But maybe, maybe if God had not been so
distant, maybe if Moses had just come down from the mountain every few days,
they would not have felt so abandoned, they would not have felt so alone, they
would not have to turn to chaos.
There are at least two things we can take
from today’s story. The first, is an understanding
about the Resurrection and why it is so important.
Today we saw what happens to God’s people
when they feel abandoned or alone. Imagine
how Mary Magdelene, Mary, Peter, and all the disciples felt after Jesus was
crucified.
Imagine how horrible and lonely that
Friday and Saturday felt, how long those nights lasted.
What would’ve happened to all the people
following Jesus if the Resurrection had not been experienced, if there was no
Good News that Christ is raised?
Second, we experience another answer to
the question “Why?”
Why does St. Lucas matter? Why do we come here to gather? Why do we worship?
Why do we faithfully give to the mission,
ministry and the building that is St. Lucas?
Because St. Lucas is one way we get to
experience God.
St. Lucas is one place we get to come
together after all the Red Seas and wildernesses of the week before so chaos does
not take over or to take control.
St. Lucas is where we are reminded that we
are not alone, we are not forsaken, we are not abandoned.
St. Lucas reminds us that God is not far
away or distant or up on some hill for 40 days, but that God is right here,
right now.
With us; besides us.
Seeing us.
Hearing us.
Speaking to us.
Speaking with us.
Reminding us of who we are, and where we
belong.
We do not need a golden calf; we do not
need to break God’s heart.
Because here we know that Christ is
resurrected;
God is forever present,
and no matter what chaos we face, no
matter what Seas we walk through,
God is here; God is now.
For that, we can say “Amen.”
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